I don’t do change well.
It takes forever to recover from even minor hiccups in the routine.
Deciding not to plan for the week was far from brilliant.
I didn’t really end up with any inspiring breakfasts. Starting the day with massive amounts of fruit is delicious, but all the sugar leaves me kind of buzzed/anxious all morning, then crashy and tired going into practice. Crappy yoga is pretty much an open invite for MV- I start having fat yoga, and believing that not eating is the answer to all my yoga strife. When practice is hard, all I want to do is shower and sleep when I get home. Except, I don’t sleep, because I feel horrible, sore, shakey, angry. So, I stay up all night, then oversleep, wake up late, stuff my face with fruit as I’m running out the door, and start the whole thing over again. Repeat. Repeat. Repeat.
Today, I tried adding the snack. Like we planned. I brought grapes and almonds, wrote 12nn on the jar and set it on my desk, so I wouldn’t forget.
No worries. Forget, I did not. Instead, I was panicking by 10. By the time I headed outside with my jar at noon, I was in full on meltdown mode, curled up in the grass by the pond and cried. I knew it was stupid. Almonds and grapes are easy, alone by the pond is easy. But I could not get a grip. SC was on a plane and whatever I sent to Carmen didn’t make sense, confused her and made her mad.
I feel horrible tonight. I have the worst headache ever! It feels like a dehydrated headache, but I drank at least a gallon of water today, had two electrolyte packs and didn’t practice, so that doesn’t make sense.
I need to reset. Get back on track. I CAN do it, and I WANT to. Everything works better when I eat right. But what I’m doing clearly isn’t working.
So, I am backing up a little, and starting from The Cup again. I got everything ready tonight, when I wake up in the morning, I won’t have to think about it. Just fire up the ninja, and go to work- with The Cup and snack jar.