For you

For you, I would walk through fire and enjoy every second of it, if you needed me to.

I got to talk to my baby for several hours last night. It’s amazing. We had a real conversation for the first time ever. She asked me questions AND responded to my answers. When we met, she peed in my car because she couldn’t tell me she needed to go to the bathroom. The last time I saw her, she told me if she ate the sun, she would fart fire. But she couldn’t engage farther than that, so I think she was parroting something she’d heard at school.

She asked if I was still saving animals, and taking care of kids. I told her no more cats, but I’m still baby sitting. She said “oh. The cat got your nose?” (She is allergic to cats and constantly had a runny nose with us). Then she said “what!? You still watch kids? Do you love them as much as me?” I assured her I would never love them as much as her.

She’s starting to ask questions, about what happened. I won’t speak ill of her parents. They created her, and she is precious, so in spite of everything, I love them, and will only express that to her. Her questions lead me to believe that she understands it’s not my fault, without me telling her.

She told me that they will be in my city for vacation in 2 weeks and asked if she could see me. I told her she had to ask her dad, but if he said yes I would take her anywhere. She asked to go to a “fancy sit down place”.

You have to understand, I held her in a physical restraint for THREE HOURS at Sea World while she screamed like a maniac because she was HUNGRY and could NOT express that!

I took her to Subway and she ordered a “piggy sandwich, please” because pig and ham are the same sign.

She cried “same mommy! Same mommy! Same mommy!” At McDonald’s for months before I figured out that she wanted extra pickles, through lots of trial and error.

And of course, the last time I saw her she spent 20 minutes LOUDLY demanding “dildo” on her ice cream. The entire building went silent and watched in horror as I calmly worked with her to get to a solution, with her screaming “dildo! DILDO! DILDO!” over and over again. Turns out…

Dildo = sprinkles

And after ALL that work, the place we were at didn’t even have sprinkles!

You can see, how thrilling it is for her to request so clearly something like a “fancy, sit down place”. Obviously, I will find her the fanciest sit down place in the city, and I will eat with her, AND enjoy it.

The MV is no match for my love for this child!

I was at a concert, CRYING. Like. C*R*A*Z*Y. because we were FINALLY talking, and my phone started to die. I told her I had to go, and she panicked, begging me not to, and asking me to promise we would talk again very soon.

She loves me, still! She isn’t mad at me. She wants to see me. We got to talk. I’m still so shocked and happy.


I talked to the baby!

I talked to the baby this morning!
I last saw her in 2009, we took this picture.


She found me on Facebook! We said hello quickly. I gave her my number and told her she can text me any time. Last time I saw her, she’d just gotten her first cellphone, and was texting me all the time. When I got back to Florida her dad accused me of losing the new phone. I assured him I had safely returned both the child and her cellphone after our visit. He never let me see her again. But a year later, he let me know the phone had been found… With one of her school friends.

Anyway. She’s 14 now.


Weird Weekend

I had a 4 day weekend! It was soooo nice!

Friday, I ran errands, then Avery and I met some friends for a picnic/movie on the beach.




Saturday, we went to Eco Fest.

The guy working this booth said “Hey, can you get your giant dog to jump up in this boat?” Sure dude, no problem. Want me to have her pose for you?

I love everything about this picture with the two pillars, bridge, American flag, and of course, my gorgeous puppy.


Oh! And I was offered a job!

Teaching at a youth sailing program. AND Avery would get to join me!!!

Really really big day!

It could have been the one awesome thing I did for like a month, when, in fact, it was just a tiny little sliver in the amazingness of yesterday.

This happened


For the first time since my accident, I went windsurfing. Please excuse the poor form, I was shaking so much being up there again! But it felt good.

After kayaking with a friend, I noticed a guy struggling with a simple maneuver. I watched for a while and could tell he was getting frustrated. The friend I was with said to go help him. I was worried he’d get mad– not all dudes are ok with being told what to do by girls, especially ones as little as me. But I could tell he was really working hard trying to get it right, so I walked over and told him how to fix it. He gave me a funny look and asked if I knew anything about windsurfing. I said “a thing or two.” And introduced myself. He asked if I wanted to take a ride on his stuff. So I went for it.
It was poorly tuned, and oddly set up, but I didn’t want to act like a snob. I had gotten a new just for fun board right before I left for Texas where I hit my head. It’s still in the packaging at my mom’s. I exchanged numbers with the guy to go out together again some time. I think it might be time to finally take my new board for a ride.

Luckier than “normal”

Earlier today I told a friend that I couldn’t spend the whole day with her tomorrow because I needed to play with my dog. She said normal people don’t worry so much about spending time with their dogs.

Then, later in the day, Carm invited me to come over to watch tv. But I had to decline the offer because Avery and I were going to the movies.

We took a walk on the beach


Enjoyed a beautiful sunset


Met this plastic dude


Watched the movie


And snuggled under the stars


If it’s not normal to have a dog as awesome as mine, then I’m glad I’m not normal!!!